In my reflections, if a bona fide member of the academy comments that my reflection contains either an original thought or argument, I will note it in that reflection. Also, if it is brought to my attention that what I have said is also mentioned in another source, I will also note it. My intention in these reflections is to stimulate inquiry, imagination, and broadening of horizons.- JP

Note: The most recent reflection is at the top and my first is at the bottom. You can either start at the bottom of the well and swim up or start at the top and dive in, your choice. – JP

It’s Been A While - 02/01/2012

My Web Master keeps sending me emails asking “Are you still there”? I am, and I have been reading a lot. That is not a good reason to not keep up on the reflections, but I also am not into writing just for the sake of writing. Having said that, I don’t want to inflict on you, the gentle reader, a stream of consciousness essay that may end sometime tomorrow. Sooooo … , what comes to mind is a thought from the daily devotions Barb has been reading, Idle or Idol?

To paraphrase the thought, “You can not not do something, even not taking action is a decision, an action, to not do something”. This seemingly arcane or ridiculous statement, depending on your view, does get to the heart of the matter as you tease out all the possibilities. Even if you are a person who believes that no matter what you do, itdoesn’t make a difference, your seeming indifference allows things to happen that my not have happened if you had taken some action.

All this brings me to the point that when your position is to remain in “Idle”, you have made an “Idol” of changing nothing and keeping everything the same. It is my contention that this position is an exercise in futility. The moment that is “now” is not exactly the same as it was a moment ago and is not going to be exactly the same in the moment that does not yet exist. So even when you stay in idle, there are people surrounding you who are not idle and what they dochanges your situation which means that what you think has not changed really has changed, Bummer!! And the point of me telling you this is?

The point is, don’t waste your abilities. Everyone has the ability to do something. The only difference between people is the degree of their abilities. Because you have read this far, here comes the cheerleading. Say out loud to yourself, “My passion is to …. No matter what the obstacles, and if I even think I can not do it alone, I will find someone to help me”.

Now you have your action plan and know that there is no “idle”.

Reflection on ‘Still Alice’ by Lisa Genova - 06/27/2011

A good friend and food purveyor encouraged me to read this book. OK, she really promised me a smoothie and muffin if I would let her know what I thought about it. Food; encouragement; they go together. Anyway...

If you have not had any one in your family, a friend, acquaintance, or some one you know of who is experiencing Alzheimer’s, read this book so you will be prepared when you do meet Alzheimer’s face to face. The beauty of this book is the way the disease and its effects on patient and family are presented.

In total opposition to a clinical presentation of this subject, you will experience knowing moments, tears, and laughter ending up with an appreciation for and ability to encounter Alzheimer’s and all that goes with it. It would have been nice if this book would have been available before I encountered my first Alzheimer’s hospice client and came across as a complete idiot. At least I kept my hands warm while I sat on them.

This book is a pair of warm gloves for your hands, hot tea for your heart and new neurons for your head.

P.S. I’m not getting anything from Lisa for this reflection unless she gets to Sandpoint and Barb and I get to take her to dinner.

They said what? On second thought, maybe... 06/12/2011

Earlier this year, a very good friend died. I was privileged, honored and humbled to officiate at the funeral and celebration of life with the family. But, as with any momentous time in life when we want every detail to go perfectly, something always creeps in to bring you up short.

A good friend of the family went to great lengths to write an obituary which would relate the essence of an extraordinary life. My friend requested to be scattered on the family property and this is where the “something” starts to creep in. The obit was emailed to the local paper and published on the day of the funeral. The sentence, “The ashes will be scattered on the family property” was printed as “The ashes will be scatted on the family property”.

Now for those of you unfamiliar with wild life terms and do not have bear, elk and moose walking across your front yard or down the main street of town ala Northern Exposure, “scat” is the polite company word for wild animal poo. I admit that my first reaction was to wonder why the publisher and editor of the paper are not walking the main street of town in sack cloth and ashes with bags over their heads wearing sandwich boards which read; “We don’t know what we are doing”, however, upon further reflection...

If, after the ashes are appropriately committed, eventually consumed and recycled by one of God’s wild creatures, I have to ask myself, is that really something to worry about? That thought leads me to reflect on the one phrase which I alter for Ash Wednesday and one of the prayers in the funeral service, “dust to dust”. I do not alter it because of theological hubris or an extraordinary esoteric argument, I alter it because of what a four year old sage said during an Ash Wednesday service.

During the service there is the “Imposition of ashes” when the priest dips their finger in a bowl of ashes which come from burning the previous year’s palms from Palm Sunday and says, as they make the sign of the cross on peoples’ foreheads with the ashes, “you are dust and to dust you shall return”. At this particular service, I came to the four year old only to have him pull away and give me “the look”. His mother brought him to me after the service to have him explain why he did not want the ashes on his forehead. He looked me right in the eyes and said defiantly, “I’m no dust bunny!” Back to the metaphor and symbol board.

So if we are not dust bunnies, what are we and where did we come from? Now if you are a dyed in the wool creationist and obviously have read this far, I hope you continue, but if you quit after the next sentence, I understand. After a lot of reading, conversation, contemplation and prayer, I believe that we come from star dust and to star dust we will return.

I believe we are the product of the conscious thought of God, as is the universe in which we exist, and there is no separation. As to the mechanics of how we were formed, whether it was from mud or mind, let it be. The first particles that appeared formed stars and all that surrounds them. The planets formed from the cooling material. And God decided to play in the mud puddles. Mud puddles that came from star dust. Some of my most fun memories are of playing in mud puddles and walking away with only one shoe arm in arm with my best friend laughing all the way home.

So, whether you decide to be buried in a concrete vault, buried at sea, cremated and have your ashes spread, sent out to sea in a flaming boat, laid on a platform exposed to the elements and consumed by God’s wild creatures, or sent into space to eventually crash into the sun, you are from star dust and to star dust you shall return, except for your conscious being, and that’s another reflection. As for my friend, being “scatted” fits into the Cycle of Life. Hey, I think there is a musical somewhere in there!

Ritual: Icon or Idol? 05/09/2011

During my first trip to The Gambia, while climbing to the top of a hill to watch the sunrise, one of the group, who is a travel reporter and has seen many, many slides said,”If you’ve seen one sunrise, you’ve seen them all”.

On the way back to the boat I heard, “about the comment I made earlier about sunrise, I may not have been entirely correct”. I responded, “Yea, it’s the same when people say to me, ‘When you’ve seen one church, you’ve seen them all’, which led us into a discussion about the rituals we all have in life.

All of life is based on ritual, from the minuscule to the majestic. Not sure? Do you brush your teeth before or after you shower, and why do you repeat the order day after day? Is your spiritual practice free form or rigid? Does the last question make you feel uncomfortable? Rituals, and how we conduct them, especially spiritual rituals, go to the core of our being.

In my first theology class in seminary, we read “The Myth of the Eternal Return” by Mircae Eliade. One chapter about rituals and how exact they need to be for some, gave the example of the shaman conducting a ceremony which had been handed down for generations. All the words, movements and paraphernalia had to be exact. In this particular instance, the lighting of the open fire was the culmination of a days long ritual intended to bring fertility to the land. At the moment of the lighting of the fire and the incantation of the words, a frog appears from nowhere and leaps over the fire to the chagrin of all attending. Oh well, back to the beginning or it won’t work!

The afternoon of that class session, I was shopping at the local wine merchant and came across a bottle of “Frog’s Leap” wine, an obvious competitor to Stags Leap. I bought the bottle, gave it to my professor and heard he put it on a shelf in his private library and never opened it.

And for those of you who say that is exactly why you left a regimented church for a non liturgical setting, consider this. What would happen if the moderator of your non liturgical church arbitrarily changed the order of events at your gathering?

We need ritual, elaborate or not, we need ritual. The object of the exercise is to maintain the ritual as authentic to the spiritual quest. When the ritual, and not the quest, becomes the object of adoration or veneration, I propose that the ritual has become an idol that cannot withstand frogs. And why does that happen?

When we think we have got it all right. When the ritual is exactly correct and the meal that comes with it is just right...

God jumps on the chair next to us at our meal and asks ... Would you like monkey poo with that?

The Door of No Return - Easter 2011

I made my first trip to Africa last February, Senegal and Gambia, with the main part of the trip up the Gambia River to the last British outpost during the slave trade which is now the Governor’s seat for that province. Although the main purpose of the trip was to see the wildlife of the Rivers of West Africa, (Trans. take lots of bird pictures), we did go to Goreé Island and see one of the slave houses. There are actually seven slave houses on the island, but not all of them are shown to tourists. Walking the short hallway to the “door of no return” is an experience. For some, they get a sense of the spirits of those who passed through, I, however, did not get a sense of the spirits, but got the feeling of what must have been going through the minds of those who walked through the door. Some back ground first.

History tells us that somewhere between 15 to 20 million people were put on slave ships from Goreé Island. What I learned from our guide was that in addition to those who got on the ships, six million killed themselves by jumping off the gangway into the sea. And although Alex Haley may have embellished some of the facts in Roots, the most moving moment was passing by James Island, just renamed Kunta Kinte Island by Gambia, near the mouth of the Gambia River. What made it moving was the realization that Kunta Kinte could see his village, where he had been captured, from the slave house on James Island, knowing that he most likely would never get back to the village again. Slaves were offered their freedom if they could swim the four miles to shore. None of those who tried made it, crocodiles!

Once on Goreé, a slave spent around two weeks sitting naked on a dirt floor chained to twenty-four other men and moved out once a day to pee and crap on a designated plot of ground. When the ship arrived, you got moved from the dark room to the bright light of the small courtyard into the dark hallway with the arched doorway at the end which is so bright that you cannot see any features, just a bright white light. As you pass through the archway, this is it, either a walk on the wooden pier to the ship, or the plunge into the surf breaking on the rocks where the sharks have grown in population because of the new food source. Which brings me to Jesus’ penultimate words from the cross.

I have been trying to write this reflection since February, but could never break through the “get ‘er done” barrier. When I went to an Easter Eve service, I found out why. The service was a presentation of the words of Jesus from the cross. The second to last words, the penultimate for you ANGLOPHILES, are, “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me”? These words manifest fear and trembling in preachers who have to condense the theological discourse of years into ten minutes for a sermon given to people who only show up twice a year and really don’t want to consider the possibility that Jesus had any doubts. However, ...

This was when I got the connection between Jesus and the slave walking through the door. For the slave who plunged from the pier into the sea, I imagine the emotions could have ranged from, “the pain of death is more acceptable than the unknown pain waiting on the ship” to “I am not going to let anyone use me for less than I am, you don’t get to take me!” Likewise, “My God...” can be seen as the ultimate expression of confusion and/or doubt, or the ultimate fist pump of defiance, but only if you leave it there. Read ALL of Psalm 22.

For the slaves that got on the ship I imagine the emotions ranged from one of hope that whatever lay ahead, it would be better than the sharks, to one of defiance that I will do whatever it takes to not let these people make me less than I am. Was Jesus calling on Elijah or letting us know that no matter how strong your faith may be, we are all subject to the possibility of experiencing that moment when it all seems to be no more than a plot of ground outside a slave house? For me, the answer comes at the end of the psalm. God does not leave us. God did not abandon the slave who plunged into the sea, God did not abandon the slave who got on the ship, and God does not abandon us when we voice despair. Why?

I believe we are products of the conscious thought of God, and as such, are inextricably connected to God. We cannot break that bond and neither can God. We can try to separate ourselves from God, which doesn’t really work out too well, or we can, like Jesus, allow ourselves to acknowledge moments of despair and in that acknowledgment, end up praising God for not abandoning us. Easter is about God letting us know that we have nothing to fear. Easter is about knowing that even while experiencing the most gruesome of moments, they are not the end.

I may yet encounter my ancestors in spirit or visions as I continue on my spiritual journey or I may get to hold the hand of a slave walking on that pier. Whatever needs to come my way will as it will be for you and because of Easter, it won’t be and end.

Response to a Request 01/21/2011

A friend who is working on a book asked several people to submit their thoughts on passing on wisdom to people younger than they are. The form of the submission is a letter to your children. This presents a situation because we do not have children. However, I have, on occasion, actually carried on conversations with people younger than eighteen and would say it this way in a letter.

Dear (enter name here),

Thank you for asking. I find it a daunting prospect to “pass on wisdom” in a letter short enough to be readable and not filled with clichés and also not come across as a “how to” checklist. I can also foresee my response could come across as to esoteric, enigmatic or obtuse. Be that as it may, here goes!

I see wisdom as an ongoing process. Gaining wisdom or discovering it is what life is. The best approach I have found is to always be open. You will not always agree with or understand what you hear or discover, but that does not mean that what you encounter is not valid. Deciding what you do with the information is gaining wisdom.

I believe we all live by our choices. I also believe if our choices are going to lead us into wisdom, we need to be consistent in how we live. The two guidelines I use are the stuff of cliché. “Do to others as you would have them do to you” is a guideline I do not restrict to only people. Do to Spirit, Earth, animals, parents (and mothers-in-law) as you would have them do to you. Continually engage your spiritual component.

When you begin to unpack the possibilities of those two guidelines, I am sure you will discover that the unpacking is never ending, like my garage, but is how you live into wisdom.

Also, no matter what, there is always something to smile about in what you discover.

Smile a lot.

Epiphany 01/06/2011

On the second Sunday of Christmas this year, I listened to a sermon in which the preacher bemoaned those who take twelve days to celebrate Christmas. It was a great sermon, but caused me to leave immediately after the service to redirect the truck delivering the eight Belted Galway Guernseys and the van with the eight maids and their buckets. So much for that Christmas present! However, what was said about Epiphany is well worth repeating.

Well before Christmas became the norm for holiday celebration, Epiphany was celebrated as the day next to Easter considered most holy for those who believe in Jesus. It was a recognition of that “Aha” moment when the visitation of the Magi spoke to the world of a complete change of relationship with God. I also believe, as the preacher I mentioned does, God incarnating as Jesus of Nazareth was not a “coming down” but a “drawing to” of humanity. God, Consciousness, Source, however you want to term the concept, added a new dimension to the Creation. “I feel your pain” (said with a slight southern drawl and raspy voice) has become a cliche, but does accurately describe what God now feels that God did not experience prior (apologies to Brian) to incarnating as a human. So what has this got to do with celebrating the Twelve Days of Christmas?

Several years ago, I became frustrated with Christmas ending with the 25 minute present orgy. It seemed so anti climactic after the joyous build up to have it end so quickly. I was relating my feelings one day in a clergy gathering and the Rabbi told how Chanukah is celebrated. You start with a small gift on the first day, a successively larger gift on the following days and on the eighth day you get the Jaguar. Haven’t got the Jaguar yet, but Barb and I did start a new tradition the next Christmas. We give one gift each day for the twelve days. They aren’t always larger, but it does lessen the post 25 DEC let down. AND, the unexpected benefit was over the years we realized we were building the anticipation of celebrating Epiphany. I can imagine the early Christians began to celebrate the time between the Winter Solstice as a time of anticipation culminating in a celebration of God’s incarnation.

Added to Epiphany is also the celebration that it is only three months till the boat goes in the water for the Summer. Happy Epiphany!

The Inevitable Christmas Reflection 12/22/2010

I have been asked more than once since my last reflection; What are you going to say for say Christmas? Well I actually have been composing this reflection over several weeks with one overriding issue, APPREHENSION! I have written a Christmas piece for every newsletter for the past fifteen years and, after rereading them, they seem worthy of being left on the snowbank of history. I mean, not only after fifteen years, but after two thousand, what can you say about Christmas that has not already been said? It is a task akin to kicking a football being held by Lucy. Then it hit me: there is something different about the way I see Christmas this year.

Being able to stand back and not be responsible for orchestrating the activities of Advent and Christmas allow for time to hear how others from many different perspectives experience this Season of Joy What leapt out at me after many conversations and several books, was what I see as the common factor in all the celebrations: FEAR.

Fear? That's a real downer, you can't really mean that. Look at all the joy in the celebrations, the happy people around the tree, the presents, the egg nog, the parties. Christmas is fun, right?

Yes it is, but what I see underlying all of it is fear of not getting what you want, not having the party work out exactly as you planned it, fear of not having your loved one love the present you gave them because they should because you love it, right? And here is the irony, we have Christmas because of the fear.

I believe God became incarnate to show us we do not have to fear. I believe God, incarnate as Jesus of Nazareth, reconciled creation and calls us all to be in balance with it and not fear anything. Now that may sound Pollyannish but ask yourself this. Why, at this time of year, do people, even non Christians and some dedicated atheists, participate in putting up a tree, buying presents, dressing up as Santa for their kids and wearing costumes to parties that were never meant to be worn in climates of less than 75ºF? We do all these things because at the heart of it all is the reason for the season.

The reason is simple. Light dispels darkness, joy replaces sadness, faith replaces fear. Consider that despite all the distasteful, i.e., crap, stuff we have to deal with, even between the trenches of WWI, the light shines. We will go to extremes to replace sadness and disappointment with joy even in the face of the fear that we may not be able to, with only the faith that we can.

I believe this happens because God showed us in human form and taught us that we are more than we give ourselves credit for. We have the ability to do things more than these and do not have to be bound by fear. We can care for the least of these, the widows, the orphans (which includes all of us whose parents have died) and those who deserve justice. The Joy of Christmas is meant for the whole year.

So cook the Christmas goose, raise a glass of wassail, and repeat after me: "God bless us everyone."

I Would or Wood Eye 8/11/10

So for those of you who know the joke the title refers to, yes, it is most likely inappropriate if not merely in bad taste but it does get in a round about way to a reflection on a spoken phrase which drives this English Language and Literature major nuts. “I would like to ...” And I am glad that you “would like to ...” so are you going to?

I would like to introduce ... That's nice, are you going to? I want to have X come forward. What if X doesn't want to come forward? “I would” or “I want” are appropriate when we are expressing a desire. They are not appropriate as requests for permission. So why does this seemingly innocuous phrase attract my ire? Everybody does it, right? I hear it all the time from local to national newscasters, so what's the big deal? The big deal is, at least for me, that use of this phrase belies a condition which is eating away at our ability to function as a community.

I don't like conflict any more than the next person and I enjoy it when people agree with me. I am sure I am not alone in these perspectives. However, not everyone is going to like me and conflict is always present. “I would like to ...” and “I want to ...” have crept into our syntax over centuries in an effort to ameliorate our confronting conflict and dislike. The problem is, they only exacerbate the situation rather than tone it down or eliminate it. So what is a person to do? How about this, “Let your yes be yes and your no be no”. When you have a desire, express it. When you need permission, ask for it. When you need to state an imperative, do it!

Try this exercise for a week. Whether you are giving a presentation at work or praying, do not use either “I would like to” or “I want to”, e.g., “my next slide shows...”; “please direct your attention to...”; “join me in welcoming our next speaker to the podium”. I am sure you will experience at least two things.

One, people will pay attention and take notice of what you are saying because you won't sound like everyone else. Two, you will become more certain in not only your communicating, you will also become more aware of your authentic desires and feelings.

I believe the long term effect, when more and more people take this approach, will be community in balance. Conflict will still exist, and not everyone will like you, but there will be less angst. “I'd like to get the world to sing, in perfect harmony”. It is the real thing.

Next reflection, do not use the word “just” when you pray.

Just Do It, Just Say No
(With apologies to Nancy and Nike)

I always have to ask myself why some words and phrases set me on edge, viscerally affect me, or simply make me sigh. Is it simply my seeing things differently from the speaker or is it a feeling that what I am hearing is actually affecting my being?

There could be a LONG list of phrases for this reflection, I shall, however, deal with only one word. Just.

When the Hebrews put their revelation of God into words, the one aspect they were pointed in defining was God as personal, immanent and intimate. In the King James translation, this close relationship was kept because the words ÒtheeÓ and ÒthouÓ were the same as ÒyouÓ and ÒyourÓ are today. Through the years we have elevated thee and thou to royal status and created a gulf between us and God. AND, we have exacerbated that gulf with the use of a four letter word when we pray, JUST.

When we use ÒjustÓ we reinforce our concept of a gulf between us and God despite, even for the literalists, the many times God has been quoted in scripture saying that I am with you always and will never leave your side. We then can use that gulf as an excuse or justification for why God does not answer our prayers the way we want them answered.

So whatÕs a person to do? Do not use the word JUST when you pray.

Think IÕm way off? Try it for a week and just see how different your relationship to God becomes.

Where in the M are we? 7/25/10

I have been watching Through The Worm Hole with Morgan Freeman on The Science Channel, but this is not a critique of the series. This is a reflection on eternity and how the series has filled in some critical pieces in my personal quest to articulate how I can continue to exist after the Universe does not. But first, let me go back in my life to ground why this question is important for me.

My first recollection of any kind of spirituality was my baptism. I was four months old and I remember the white lacy whaterveritwas I wore, the green and white tile floor and the water on my head. Can't remember any of the words, just that I had to pee after the water. Then there was the first story about Jesus when I started Sunday School at age four. Easter was a mystery until I had it all figured out by second grade. I did not know my mother's parents even though there is a picture of her mother holding me before I was one year old. I got to know my father's parents very well and then in the fourth grade, Grandpa died. It hit me like a ton of bricks. Jesus loves us and this isn't supposed to happen. I was not mad at God, I just knew I did not like this dying thing. One night I woke up and yelled to my mother that I did not want to die. She told me I wouldn't. Confusion reigns and the easiest way to deal with it is to not dwell on dying, just move on. When two friends my age died, it was, “Oh crap, pause, OK, let’s move on.”

In high school I began to engage what Easter meant to me and what happened after physical death. I was able to do this because a good friend said, “I can’t tell you for a fact what happens when we die, but I can tell you what I believe if you want to hear it.” Honesty and Mark Twain’s, Captain Stormfield’s Trip to Heaven were watershed moments in my spiritual evolution. Then in college some geek TA in an introductory astronomy class talked about entropy and the collapse of the Universe. “Wait just a freekin’ minute here, if the universe collapses, what happens to my eternal ass” (I was in college, we talked like that)? Graduation and twenty years in the Air Force flying at 600 miles an hour a hundred feet off the ground takes your mind off the question.

After the Air Force I found myself going to Seabury-Western Episcopal Seminary. I graduated and was ordained to the Priesthood in July 1994 on Bastille Day (still have not found an organist who will play the Marseillaise for the procession). Now I can not dodge the “what happens when” question. As it turns out, St. Anselm, many conversations with my classmates, teachers and colleagues and a healthy dose of process theology have been instrumental in the development of how I answer the question.

No matter what position you take, whether we are the products of the conscious thought of God, or that we are the result of a beautiful accident, what existed before the thought or the accident? Enter the Science Channel, Through the Worm Hole and the miracle of CGI (computer graphic images). Some of us have evolved in our spirituality where journeys in astral planes allow for a really big picture observation, e.g., Paul in the third heaven, the Buddha, and the disciple beaming from a conversation with a Nubian in Egypt to Lebanon between sentences. Most of us haven’t evolved that much however, and the graphics in Through the Worm Hole were my AHA! moment. Specifically the episode on M theory. What caught me was not the mechanics of membranes touching thereby causing many big bangs, or the possibility of this universe not being the first or last iteration of what we label as our existence. What caught me was being in the position of an observer and not ceasing to exist when the ‘branes touched. I truly felt at that moment, and do now, that we are the products of the conscious thought of a creator, inextricably a part of that creator as that creator is part of us and that the mechanics of how it all works are part of the marvelous quest of discovery in which we get to participate. I can’t tell you for a fact what happens when we die physically, but I will tell you what I believe if you want to hear it.

Mechanics Theology 7/5/10

The hardest part of this reflection was coming up with a title. This is not a reflection about people who are mechanics or a theology they might profess. It is a reflection of what people seem to be really worried about. I am sure that some of you will wonder why I came to this thought late in life when it might seem so obvious. Well, some are slower than others.

In my latest spate of reading, I was able to express that what sets people apart in their spiritual quest is not their beliefs as much as it is how their beliefs are implemented or the explanation of how those beliefs work. For this discussion, I am going to limit myself to that with which I am most familiar, Christianity.

I was engaged in a conversation with two other clergy, each from a different denomination. The specific point was Baptism and what constituted an “appropriate” and “authentic” baptism. We all agreed to the premise that the Holy Spirit is involved. We all agreed that there is a change in our spiritual approach when baptized and then the conversation proceeded to move into the “appropriate and authentic” discussion.

What I found amazing was one clergy saying to another that although he believed they were both good Christians, one was not correct. OK, I should not have been amazed, but like I said, some of us are slow to see the intellectual become tangible. It did not hit so much as a brick but like a pie thrown in slow motion. You both believe in God. You both believe in Jesus. You both believe in heaven. But you both believe the other is incorrect. You can’t have it both ways, or can you?

What my two colleagues are worried about, deep down, is not God, but how God is interpreted. Yes, my literalist friends, literalism is an interpretation. The way out, the way to have it both ways, however, comes at a price. That price is giving up your ego interpretation and living the position that I don’t agree with you, but that doesn’t mean you should change. It does mean that we need to consider how it would benefit us both to allow each other to live our belief and not force our interpretation on the other.

I worship in a way that makes sense to me and I realize it may not make sense to others, and that’s OK. I am not troubled about the mechanics of how, in fact I find the many “how” possibilities exciting. I do wonder though, if my two colleagues will still be arguing about Baptism when they both arrive in heaven.

Keynote Address to Sandpoint Memorial for Idaho Peace Officers May 14, 2010

We are gathered today to honor those who died in the line of duty and those who have died after completing their careers. In the reading of their names and remembrance of their accomplishments, we are also keenly aware of those who are serving beside us and for us.

There are no words that can remove the pain and heart felt disappointment which accompany any death. In the time of our grieving, we may hear someone tell us, it’s OK, you’ll get over it. My admonishment to you is to not “get over it”. Those we honor today are threads in the fabric of our lives. To “get over it” means we are willing to remove that thread which will diminish both the person who served and ourselves. Rather, we should always remember and be glad that thread is part of the ever increasing fabric of our lives. What makes a thread worth remembering?

I do not have a definitive answer, rather, two observations. My first observation is there is an added dimension to those who willingly serve in positions of known higher risk. We see it most clearly in law enforcement and fire protection. This is not to say that other professions do not share the same characteristics, but I have yet to have an F-16 land on the road in front of me and issue someone a ticket for speeding or a naval fire boat sail up Lincoln to put out the fireworks sparks on the roof of my house which were so graciously donated by my neighbors on the 4th. What we do see in our everyday lives are the police cruiser and the fire truck. What we also need to see are the people inside those vehicles. What are the characteristics of a person who is willing to meet a situation that can be benign or a mortal confrontation? Acknowledging those characteristics leads me to my second observation.

I believe there are at least six characteristics. Acceptance, compassion, forgiveness, humility, understanding and valor. Acceptance of the complete situation in which you find yourself. This does not mean agreeing with everything you see, but seeing everything which allows for the best decision. Compassion for the people you encounter. Compassion in the truest sense leads to authentic, ethical action which best serves all involved. Forgiveness does not equal doormat. Forgiveness means not attempting to control another’s destiny, but rather to be part of allowing a situation to find its conclusion. Humility means completeness. To be truly humble means you know yourself and are able to act rather than simply react. Understanding is more than knowledge. Understanding leads to integration of the characteristics I have mentioned so far and brings a person to be able to “do” valor. Valor is not a thing you can posses and it is not an act you can script. Valor can be demonstrated by an act as simple as putting on your socks when you would rather stay in bed or placing yourself in harm’s way to serve and protect.

So for those of us who serve those who serve, let us be ever mindful of the threads in our lives that have reached their length and those which continue to increase in length. Let us treat this memorial as a time of celebration of life and commitment. God bless this assembly and those we honor and may God keep us from speeding and playing with matches.

Easter (4/4/10)

The First word is the hardest
It Comes
Found on the precipice
Of an abyss that begs entrance
To trap that is freedom
- JP Carver, Seabury-Western, 1993

I waited for Easter to write my next reflection, not by design, but through divine procrastination. Come on, you know procrastination is divine, because if it wasn’t, then we would have to own the responsibility for it and who among us wants to do that? As it has worked out however, I was asked to give the Easter address, not at an Episcopal parish, but at a local, non denominational, spiritual center and my reflection is the talk I gave.

First let me say I felt honored and humbled to be asked to talk on Easter to a group which is varied in spiritual paths and holds as its guiding principle, respect for each person’s spiritual expression.

My remarks are based on The Last Week by Marcus Borg and John Crossan, Alan Jones’ February 27 reflection in Praying Day by Day from Forward Movement Publications, Sr. Joan Chittister’s 4 April 2010 interview on NPR, and Destiny of Souls by Michael Newton and my continuing encounter with the Divine.

Easter is about Resurrection and salvation. We have to ask ourselves what we mean by resurrection and salvation because, as unique individuals, none of us can see them exactly the same as another person will. In 1998 when I was traveling home to move my mother into an assisted living facility, I wore my clerics on the plane. The young man who sat next to me in the center seat (the one that we all hope will be left empty when we travel) turned to me and said,”I see you are a minister, when were you saved”? I responded, “On a Sunday morning at sunrise about two thousand years ago”. The rest of the flight was very quiet. I tell this, not to make fun of the difference in our view of salvation, but to point out the most difficult facet of any encounter with another when the discussion is about faith. The young man mentioned and I see salvation differently and the hard part is to be OK with the difference. I am sure he holds his belief as passionately as I do mine. The question is, are we willing to live with the difference and still treat each other as a child of Creation? How we approach each other on the subject of resurrection also brings to the forefront our passionate beliefs.

There is one thread about the Resurrection story which, I believe, makes it extremely difficult. The majority of people who you may ask, conflate the stories from Matthew, Mark, Luke and John into one tableau which tends to softball the message. Combine that with the non questioning approach to anything theological, and I feel you have a recipe for a large glob of pizza dough which, if you tried to spin it into a pie, would end up covering you from head to toe. In Mark, the women went to the tomb, found it empty, and ran away scarred and did not tell anyone, OOPS! Of course the question has to be asked, if they did not tell anyone, how do we know? In the other three Gospels, the story is fleshed out and we are able to engage looking for an expression of truth in the story. Joan Chittister said in her interview that doubt is the beginning of faith. I agree. I find it impossible to tell the Resurrection story and not have at least one person ask, “but what about...?”, which leads me to Alan Jones’ reflection on Orthodoxy.

To paraphrase his reflection, Orthodoxy, right thinking, is actually the approach which acknowledges the ambiguity of belief and the differences which exist because we are unique persons and that heresy is actually the position that the Divine can be defined in concrete, one for all, absolute terms which everyone can accept. Orthodoxy, according to Jones, actually allows for engagement with the complex, infinite character of the Creator. This brings me to the questions of what is resurrection and when does it occur?

There are those who believe that our life, even though it be eternal from birth, is a one time physical shot and that after death we are with God forever, as spirit and that resurrection occurs for all at that moment of transition. There are those who believe that we are eternal and incarnate multiple times into physical bodies on this earth to learn lessons which bring us closer to the nature God intends for us. Personally, I don’t believe in re-incarnation, because that means I will have to live life again in the same body. If I do incarnate again, I don’t mind being bald, but I’m going to be in a skinny body with a high metabolism. That being said, resurrection for me is not about time, but is that moment when, no matter what our path, we move into that “new creation” which was made possible through God’s incarnating as Jesus of Nazareth and effecting our reconciliation.

Barb and I heard a plea on TV last week from an organization which was sponsoring an Easter egg hunt. They did not have enough Easter baskets which they wanted filled with chocolate bunnies and chocolate eggs. My acculturated reaction was, “Tough, Easter is not about chocolate!”, but wait, if that is a person’s path for entry into the dialogue about what Easter is, I should sponsor a basket. As good as dark chocolate is for you (OK that’s why I’m healthy but not skinny), it only provides a small part of what I really need at Easter, a HUG! Hugging a bunny, my dog or my cat is great, but the hug of a loved one, a friend, or even a person you are meeting for the first time, is hugging God. Resurrection is the hug God gives us. Resurrection brings us into the balance God intends for Creation. That balance which allows us to move through time, dimensions, into locked rooms and eat with friends; to be one with Unconditional Love (which by the way is also embodied in a bunny, my dog and my cat).

I end this reflection with the position I hold for all I have said. I believe it to be true, I do not intend or have to prove it to be true, because, I can’t prove it, I can only believe it. And I do not ask any one else to prove what they believe to be true, I only ask them to tell me what they believe.

May this Easter be the continuation of your eternal dialogue and a hug with God.

Deflecting Attack (2/27/2010)

I have been reading a lot since the last reflection (check the latest entries to the Readings). The amount of material and the concepts I am engaging for the first time seem overwhelming. As I stepped back and looked for a theme which might pervade all that I was reading, two concepts settled out, balance and deflecting attack.

The visual I got for deflecting attack came from The Karate Kid. Alan Rickman even used it as the Metatron in the movie Dogma. Wax on, wax off. If you have not seen either of these movies, please do. Wax on; move your left hand in a counter clockwise motion as you apply wax to your car. Wax off; move your right hand in a clockwise motion as you remove the wax. Use both motions to polish the car. Why is this important? One of the first principals in martial arts is to deflect a blow rather than meet it head on with equal force. Visualize a hand coming directly towards you. Move either your left or right hand in the appropriate motion and deflect the blow away from you. When done correctly, the attack won’t hit you and you will even use the force of the attacker to move them farther away from you. This works best when you are balanced in your movement, which gets me to the second theme that is consistent in everything I have been reading.

I believe there is an ultimate goal, an ultimate truth of creation. For me, that ultimate is balance. When all is in balance, any force will be used to create rather than remove. One of my seminary professors said it best, “My up can not result in any body else’s down”. Every action has a consequence. A balanced action results in a balanced consequence.

I had a driver cut me off at the gas station yesterday. Rather than waiting for 30 more seconds for me to move through the pumps after the person in front of me left, this person pulled around to the pump in front at an angle that kept me from moving forward. The look they gave me was also one of anger. My first reaction was consideration of displaying an undiplomatic gesture, rolling down the window and telling them that although I knew they were trying their best, their best sucked. A milii second later, I realized that to regain balance, the best I could do was to back out of my spot and exit the station through an open isle. Wax on, wax off.

This incident is obviously not the most serious in degree compared to the many others that come into our lives, but they can all be approached in like manner. Jesus’ second commandment is so simply stated we can easily miss its complexity, dismiss it as a cliché or justify it can’t be real because nothing so profound can be said in seven words. However, when I learn to love my self and show that same love to my neighbors, I will be balanced and not have to use more force than necessary to deflect an attack of any size.

Winter Solstice (12/21/09)

I used to not pay much attention to the passing of either solstice other than to be disappointed in the loss of sunshine or the amount of darkness. I really did not care why it happened, only that I might be inconvenienced. This Winter solstice, however, paying closer attention to what is happening is proving to be enjoyable rather than disappointing.

Some of the enjoyment comes from thinking about the people past who determined the need to mark the event. I really would like to meet, not the person who determined the need to mark the event, but the person who was sent out to align the markers. Think about that person. At the very best, it would have taken only a year. I suspect, however, that it took much longer. How many cycles occurred before the placement of the markers was not questioned? How many times did the weather affect the observation? If you have ever been in England, the sun is blocked by weather at the most inopportune times. My imagination also leads me to wonder how did the person placing the markers keep competitors from either moving or removing them. Once the markers were established, I wonder how they were used.

Were they used simply to make an observation, or were they used for a spectrum of reasons. That spectrum could extend from those who used the marker to designate the time for a ritual in which they pleaded with nature to not leave them in darkness to those who marked the day as a time of celebration that nature’s cycles repeated in a pattern which provided for their sustenance.

Although it took me several years past my exposure to astronomy in school to be able to visualize the tilted earth revolving around the sun and the reason for the seasons, I never felt the impulse to perform a blood sacrifice to get the sun to rise and the winter to end. I also, until recently, did not feel a compulsion to mark this astronomical moment with any extended celebration. My position has changed.

Thanking God for this creation and marveling at its complexity in awe filled silence definitely has its place. In addition, I have also experienced that a lively, community expression of joy for the beautiful complexity of creation is also as necessary. The Celtic based observance I experienced this solstice fused the tactile, transcendent, primal, intellectual, scientific, and theological into a focus on embracing the night because it brings the day and embracing the light that fills both day and night.

I did not get to check to see if the marker I placed in my yard was correct because the sun has not shone this day on my yard for the past three years. I did however, quietly note internally that I will enjoy the next Winter Solstice as much as I will enjoy the warmth of the next Summer Solstice. Listen for the drums, cymbals and didgeridoo so you can enjoy it too.

JP+

Beautiful Darkness (11/13/09)

From the Green of the Season of Pentecost to the White of Christ the King to the Blue of Advent, the start of the journey into beautiful darkness. Beautiful darkness? Are you kidding? There’s nothing beautiful about darkness, ever been on Hiway 95 after dark trying to get home? Well, yes, but that is not the darkness I am talking about. Without putting yourself at risk, find time to go out when it is dark to a place with as few lights as possible. This seems to work the best in Winter.

There is something about the dark and cold of the night which puts you in a very contemplative frame of mind. There is also something about that crystal clear darkness which allows you to see farther. It’s not oppressive, but actually freeing. You get a sense of the majesty and wonder of Creation and the anticipation of not only the coming morning, but an anticipation of a wondrous change. I believe it is that anticipation of change which the early Christians wanted to incorporate into their worship of Jesus as much as anything. True, it made sense to give a different meaning to the already established pagan rituals which accompanied the change of the season. However, whether it was articulated or not, there was that age old experience of change which permeated any celebration associated with this time of year in the Northern climes.

Most of us do not spend a month talking about our birthday to come. If we celebrate it at all, it’s most likely a one day event. The Christian community, however, developed a liturgical season for the anticipation of Jesus’ birth. How that liturgical season is celebrated speaks to the theology of the community. That may seem obvious, but the striking differences speak to the diverse ways God is worshiped; with passion. But I am firmly convinced that underneath all the varied expressions is a primal need to engage the change of the season. A need to make sense of what is happening. A need to be more than a passenger on a rock watching the stars move and the sky change. A need to find out what is unique about the birth of Jesus.

Advent, literally “coming to”, gives us a time to focus on the prophetic message of God’s entrance into our physical lives. A time to contemplate the end of the world as we know it and the change brought about by Jesus’ reconciling transition. A time to be immersed in that vibrant darkness and say, Wow!!!

JP+

Beginning (10/29/09)

The first snow of the season came to Sandpoint today, the start of Winter. I know it is viewed by many as an end and not a beginning. But as we begin a new phase of our ministry, I see it as a beginning. Snow is cleansing. Even as it goes back and forth between rain and snow, the ground [and the crawl space in my house] is being prepared to accept the water it will hold until Spring. The streets are being washed by nature as is our furniture when the dog gets past us at the door and comes in to shake off the rain. Time seems to settle.

What does not settle, however, is the effort it takes to move forward into the not yet known. I am struck by the starkness of meeting people as the first followers of Jesus did; no church building, no pews, no membership rolls, no limits. It is even more stark when this effort is compared to how church has operated for the last 1700 years. For us, it is back to Jesus’ method; no coercion, live your belief.

Winter is a good time to embark on this mission. It is a good time because the movement into the dark days is like moving into a warm bed and crawling under the big down comforter knowing sleep refreshes and you always wake to a new day. It is also a good time, because I am an unabashed cheerleader for Saint Nicholas. Not the Coca-Cola version, but the Saint Nicholas whose spirit of giving has fueled our imagination and spirit for centuries.

God bless us all who are moving into Winter’s embrace as well as those who are now being warmed by lengthening days. May we be ever mindful to respect the dignity of every human being and all of creation as we live into God’s blessing.

JP+